We have been hearing a lot about self-love, Love yourself, Be the Love and a host of other love talk culminating in a cute hashtag "#selfcare sunday." While I am absolutely loving the move toward normalizing mental health, intentional living, unplugging and pouring into yourself. I want to provide some insight you may have not thought about when it comes to "loving yourself"
Sometimes the "good vibes only" doesn't seem to show up and you find yourself swarmed with a host of negative thoughts and then comes the depressive mood. The fact of the matter is things don't go our way, we feel like a disappointment and feel like we should have done better, should have been better. Where is the love now? I'll show you.
1. Acceptance: In the midst of the "negative vibes only" moment or day, lol. ACCEPT it. Often times we are taught that accepting something is giving it permission to persist but really accepting it is the first step in transmuting that negative energy and vibrating higher ( in the love zone) Acceptance of what is, is a stepping stone and an act of self Love. It is what it is...
2. Release the judgement: "Judge not lest ye be judged" When you have been caught in a cycle of bad choices or poor actions, refrain as much as you can from judging yourself. Sending blame and shame to yourself is counter productive to the results you want.
The more you dwell in the the space of judgemental thoughts of what you "shoulda" done it will only lead to more feelings of being judged, not better actions. So when you notice the judgement vibes. Be aware of it, observe the feelings and how it feels in your body. Accept that you are judging yourself and let it go, knowing it no longer is serving you.
3. Radical kindness- This one is a doozy because we are taught early on that kindness is for good people or decent people not for horrible people. lol. So if you think of yourself as horrible for doing something and attach your identity to the action even if for a moment you won't think you deserve kindness which is very far from the truth. Being kind to yourself and forgiving is the way to build your capacity to be kind and forgiving to others. Before you ever "do" anything or make an inevitable human "misstep" practice being Kind to yourself and go ahead and for- give yourself knowing that all things can be brought into awareness and used to become your true self.